Family fortunes sketch:
Music introduction:
Gaffer (hurrys out of shot ) 5., 4, 3, 2, 1 and ACTION
(holds signs reading Clap & cheer up to the audience)
Host : Thank you very much and welcome to this wonderful Christmas version of family fortunes.
Lets meet our families.
Gaffer (Holds up sign Clap & cheer to the audience)
Host: Now first we have the Secular family, how lovely to meet you, (shakes hand of Merry Secular) your name?
Merry Secular: Merry
Host: That’s an unusual name, would you like to introduce us to your family?
Merry: Well, this is my husband Santa, My eldest child Festive and My
Youngest child Noel.
Host: Is that after Nowell?
Santa: Nowell? we named him after the spirit of Christmas … Noel Edmonds!
Host: Ok, that’s the Secular family, now lets meet our other family the “Christians”
Gaffer (holds up clap &cheer)
Host: (shakes hand of Joy Christian)
And you are?
Joy Christian: Joy
Host: welcome Joy, now please introduce your family
Joy Christian: This is my Husband Lurve, My eldest child Hope and my youngest child Charity.
Host: Its time to play Christmas Family Fortunes.
Gaffer (holds up sign clap and cheer)
Host: Now you all know how this works
Right mums, lets see who is going to play first.
Merry and Joy take centre stage facing each other. Host stands just behind them.
Host: Name something to do with Christmas.
Joy : Buzz
Merry Buzz
Host: Now I think that Joy just got in a little before you Merry, so Joy what’s your answer?
Joy: Celebration
Merry: I was going to say that too!
Host: lets see if that’s on the screen ….. (celebration appears on screen)
Host: that’s great, so please return to your places and the Christian family will go first.
Gaffer (holds sign clap & cheer)
Host: We asked 100 people to name something to do with Christmas.
Ok Joy something to do with Christmas?
Joy: Shepherds
Host: Joy said “shepherds” our survey said eh ah (Red x shows on screen)
Joy: (looks bemused)
Host: So Lurve, name something to do with Christmas.
Lurve: Well Joy said shepherds and I was convinced that would be there, but as it’s not, I’m going to guess….. Angels. (looks confindent)
Host: Lurve said angles, is that one of the answers? Eh ah (2nd red X appears on screen)
Not looking too good here, right whose next? Right Hope, name something to do with Christmas.
Hope: I think it could be wise men or sometimes they are called the three kings.
Host: so we are looking for kings or wise men… is it there? Eh ah (3rd red x appears on the board.
Well we have three x’s, but not three kings, this is looking a little dire now. One more chance.
Charity it’s all on your shoulders, name something to do with Christmas.
Charity: Jesus
Gaffer (hold sign laugh)
Host: trying not to laugh well I’d be surprised if that’s there, but lets take a look. Eh ah (big red x)
Well the Christians have not found a single answer. Lets go and ask our secular family.
Ok Merry, we asked one hundred people to name something to do with Christmas can you find one of them?
Merry: Well I think one of the main things is the food, it takes up a lot of time, I spend hours cooking it al.
Host: Ok is food one of the answers? Ding (answer number 3)
Gaffer (clap and cheer)
Host: So that’s an answer, not the top one though, so perhaps Santa can give us an answer.. Santa?
Santa: I think it might be decorations, every year I climb up into the loft, take down massive boxes of baubles and tinsel and we decorate the biggest tree we can squeeze into the house, decorations must be there.
Host: Is decorations there? Ding (answer number 2)
Gaffer (clap and cheer)
Host: Your Family are on a roll now festive, can you find another answer?
Festive: I think Parties might be a winner. We go to loads and have a wonderful time celebrating christmas.
Host: Is Party on the answer board? Ding (answer number 4)
Gaffer (clap and cheer)
Host: They are on a roll now, only one answer to find. Can Noel do it?
Noel, we asked 100 people to name something connected with Christmas. Your family have come up with three of the top five answers, can you find the last one?
Noel: well I’ve been thinking about it and I think the winner has to be the thing that Christmas wouldn't be Christmas with out. I think the answer is presents….
Host: Ok lets take a look is presents the missing answer? DING DING DING Yes of course, Christmas wouldn’t be christmas with out the presents!!
Gaffer (clap and cheer)
Host: Well that’s been an exciting game. We’ve found the top answers about what Christmas is all about, Parties, presents, food and decorations. Unless of course you are in the Christian Family in which case it’s all about Shepherds, wise men, angels and (smirks) Jesus.
Gaffer: (muddles with signs, hold up laugh, hears audience laugh and looks at sign, fiddles around and then holds up Clap & cheer)
Theme music plays…….